There Are Nudges and There Are NUDGES

Week 7

I am in the process of going through and packing up everything in my parent-in-law’s home. It is no surprise that I am finding many misplaced, lost, and forgotten treasures. Nor is it a surprise that I am feeling more connected to them as I sort through the remnants of their lives. But I can’t help feeling like there is something more afoot.

Lately, I have been receiving a huge number of what I like to call, “nudges”. Nudges are when something happens to strongly remind you of someone who has passed away. They can be actual things that you misplaced or tucked away, perhaps a gift from someone who is no longer. They can be a series of things that point you in a direction you hadn’t thought of going or they can help you come to a decision that you are having trouble making. Sometimes, they are simply things that make you stop and think of your loved one for a moment, reminders and remembrances.

A few weeks ago, I found a tiny box my sister-in-law, Susan, had given me (nudge). Susan passed away on October 10, 2010. It was tucked away in the back of a dresser drawer. The precious contents were still intact exactly as they were the day I received it. A couple of days later, (nudge) I discovered yet another tiny box, this one I clearly remember arriving in the mail not long after her mother died on April 24, 2010. Again, the contents were intact. Within a matter of days, I encountered yet another small tin box she had given me (nudge). This one contained Violet scented lip balm. I had never used it before. When I opened it, my eyes filled with tears as a scent so lovely, so fragrant, so Susan washed over me, filling my senses.

Shortly after these incidences, I had an encounter that I am hesitant to talk about. It caused me to question my sanity momentarily. I frequently go to the beach at sunset to take photographs. I generally like to get photos from many angles, not just the sunset itself. On this occasion, I turned my back to the beach to catch the darkening clouds to the north. There is a bench on the beachside of the dunes and a gazebo on the other side. Other than that, it is very isolated. As is my habit, I turned and snapped, capturing a shadow out of the corner of my eye. I was lining up my next photo as I turned my head toward the bench. Sitting there, looking toward me with her head tilted to the side in a posture I have seen a thousand times, wearing a dress and hat I recognized, was a woman. I turned my head to finish taking the photo. Just that quick, the blink of an eye really, I turned back and she was gone.

I raced across the deserted sand, hitting the boardwalk hard. I cleared the dunes and saw that the gazebo was empty. I heard a voice softly say on the wind, “It’s gonna be alright, Sister”. I knew that voice! I turned in circles in that wide open space and absolutely nowhere did I see anyone at all. I began to shake as I hurried toward my car. My eyes constantly scanning every direction while my mind knew there just wasn’t anywhere anyone could hide. Had I imagined it? No, I know without a doubt that she was there. This was something much bigger than a nudge!

I do not see things that aren’t there. I do not hear voices in my head. I had no explanation for what I had just been through. Completely freaked out, I called my husband, my mother, and my best friend to tell them what had happened. They reassured me that I am not crazy. They all made it sound like it was perfectly natural given how close she and I were. Two out of three suggested that she is trying to tell me something and told me keep my eyes and ears open and to pay attention. Trust me, I am paying attention.

Along this same time period, I made a discovery that renews hope in my heart. Richard’s mom had a broach that a friend had made for her. On it there was an antique porcelain “King Cake” baby. It was one of her prized possessions. I can’t count how many times over the years she showed it to me, taking it lovingly from her jewelry box. Several years ago, she called me in tears because she had gone to get it out to show it to someone and the baby was missing from it. She had searched her jewelry box thoroughly and she was certain it was gone. She was convinced someone had stolen it. I assured her I would help her look for it the next time I visited. Needless to say we searched high and low without ever finding it. While packing the china cabinet a couple of weeks ago, I pulled down a teacup that rattled. (NUDGE) Looking into it, I was delighted to see a half-finished piece of jewelry with the tiny missing baby tucked inside. Mom’s baby had been right here the whole time. The mystery has finally been solved!

I wasted no time in gluing the pieces in the places she had set them. I know it’s a treasure that will always be dear to my heart (see photo at bottom of the page). I thought of the many times we talked about making jewelry out of tiny odd things such as clock faces, gears, screws, spoons, buttons, beads, babies, etc. I thought of the many, many supplies such as these that she had left behind. I decided to start a box to hold them all so that I might pursue dabbling with making things once we finally get moved and settled.

Today, a friend sent me a photo of something called Steampunk Jewelry (NUDGE). I fell instantly in-love with the design, the concept, and the name. Before I could respond, she sent me a link with tutorials on how to do it. I replied with a picture of the pin I so recently had discovered and finished. It turns out it is the very definition of Steampunk and I have a lot of cool stuff with which I can attempt to make my own.

I am paying attention to the nudges now. I am curious to see where they will lead me from here. If I see or hear something else, maybe I will let you know. Then again, maybe I won’t. But if you should happen to get a nudge in your own life, I hope you will recognize it for what it is and make something good of it. I hope you will think of the person who nudges you and smile as your heart fills with love.