From the Heart

From the Heart

Sunday, March 31, 2013

When There Is Nothing Nice to Say


Week 13

My grandmother always said, "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all". I am at that point in life. I have been let down recently by many of those nearest and dearest to me.

Today is Easter Sunday. I awoke thinking of what that means. As I thought of the life and death of Jesus Christ (and the subsequent rising), I couldn't help but equate it with my own life right now. I have tried to be a good person. I have preached unconditional love because I practice unconditional love. I have been tormented, persecuted, condemned, betrayed, and ridiculed. I have been judged without a judge. My only solace is knowing that, like Him, I have kept my faith. End of comparison.

I have felt the sharp edge of betrayal in ways that defy description. In the past week, I have come to recognize that much of what I once believed to be true regarding many of the people in my life was all a fallacy. Perhaps who I thought they were was just a manifestation of who I wanted them to be. Or maybe I saw only who they wanted me to believe they were. Whatever the case may be, I have seen the truth and it sickens me. It saddens me to the point of despair. My heart weeps at the loss of so many in such a very short time.

Still I pray for them as the tears stain my cheeks, because I love them still.

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